The Purpose of a No Secrets Policy in Couple and Family Therapy

Understanding the “No Secrets Policy”

In couple and family therapy, confidentiality can become complex. Each person brings individual experiences and private concerns, but the treatment unit—the couple or family as a whole—is the client.

A no secrets policy means that while individual or smaller-group sessions (such as meeting with one partner or two siblings) may occur as part of the broader treatment, information shared in those sessions may not remain entirely confidential if it affects the wellbeing or progress of the whole system.

The therapist uses professional judgment to decide whether, when, and how to bring sensitive information into the larger session—often encouraging the person who shared it to do so directly.

Why a No Secrets Policy Matters

This policy isn’t about eliminating privacy; it’s about preserving the integrity and effectiveness of therapy. When one person asks the therapist to keep something hidden that could meaningfully impact the couple or family’s work together, it places the therapist in an ethical dilemma.

A no secrets policy helps prevent conflicts of interest by ensuring the therapist can continue to serve the shared goals of the couple or family. It allows the therapist to maintain focus on the collective treatment process rather than being pulled into divided loyalties or secrecy that can undermine trust.

Balancing Individual Privacy and Shared Responsibility

Therapists understand that individuals may need space to process difficult emotions privately. Brief individual sessions can provide this opportunity while still supporting the overall therapy goals.

However, if something revealed in private is essential to the progress or honesty of the joint sessions, the therapist may decide it needs to be discussed in the larger group. Whenever possible, the therapist will invite the individual to make this disclosure themselves and offer support in doing so.

This approach ensures that transparency and accountability guide the therapeutic process while still respecting each person’s voice.

Protecting the Therapy Process

The no secrets policy helps keep therapy on course by avoiding situations that could require termination due to divided responsibilities. When everyone understands that the therapist’s loyalty is to the treatment unit as a whole, it builds a foundation of safety, consistency, and fairness.

Couples and families can trust that their therapist’s goal is not to expose anyone, but to foster open communication that supports the growth and wellbeing of all participants.

Quick Take

A no secrets policy ensures that couple and family therapy remains focused, ethical, and effective. By clarifying boundaries around confidentiality, it allows the therapist to use professional judgment in service of the whole system—protecting both the individuals involved and the integrity of the work they’re doing together.